-::- here i am... this is me -::-

Saturday, October 09, 2004

last night?

where were you last night? this is probably the question that everybody's been asking everybody. me? i was.. in.. the bathroom.

i was all hooked up with the book i was reading. i was reading for some two hours, i think. it could have been longer if i didn't have to go to the bathroom to... well... what do people do in bathrooms?

i was sitting on that little white thing and waiting for the liquid to get out (hehehe. damn, i'm bad at this) when i felt like the earth is shaking. i told myself it can't be. i was just feeling a bit dizzy because i've been reading a lot. and my head was aching a little. but when i looked at the bathroom mirror, it was moving. i wasn't convinced. i was in denial. yeah, that was a better way to describe it. in denial. i needed another proof. i looked at the pail of water and it was moving, too. oh, my lord. so the earth was really shaking. i suddenly felt dry. no need to wait anymore. i ran out of the bathroom and out of the house.

i've always been scared of earthquakes. well, who isn't. last night, the feeling was so intense. it was horrible, i almost cried. i felt like i was back in third year high. the baguio earthquake. i remember that day very clearly. we were inside the classroom. the rain just stopped. then the chairs started moving by themselves. we were stunned. we froze. it took us a while to realize what was happening. maybe because none of us had experienced it before. and then all of a sudden, everyone was going out of the classroom. all the people were screaming... crying. young, old, girls, and boys. it was like everything was shaking and the earth will open anytime and eat us all up. my head was spinning. my heart was beating so fast that it felt like it was going to come out of my chest. i wanted to cry and needed to be comforted, but there was no one to comfort me, for everybody else was crying, too. i wanted to run, but run where? i wanted to hide, but hide from what? i thought the shaking would never end. it was confusing. i was surrounded by so many people yet i felt so alone. and scared. all that feeling came back last night.

today, i was thinking about it. i still feel scared. and sometimes, i feel like it was shaking again when in fact, it's not. i will be like this for a couple more days. it happens everytime - my so called self after shocks.

why am i writing this thing? no reason. i was just reminded of it because it happened around this time last night. and same time the night before it happened, i was watching a movie with a friend. a scary movie. and it crossed my mind... what if it happened one day earlier? dammit, i don't even wanna think about it.


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"The artist is nothing without the gift, but the gift is nothing without work." - Emile Zola (1840-1902)

-::- About Me -::-

Name: shadowlane

Location: Pasig City, Philippines

people think i'm crazy. most of the time they're right.

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